A Walking Dead Recipe (Undead Hot Dogs)

The season finale of The Walking Dead runs tonight and this event calls for a special dinner/show time snack.  Here’s an easy and gory preparation, guaranteed to gross out the timid.  And, while you will need a sharp knife, you won’t need Michonne-style knife skills to pull off this food illusion.

Start with a hot dog.  Slice the tip off on a shallow angle like this… 

 …to make fingernails!!!!!!

About an inch down from the top of the fingernail, make 3 shallow cuts, about 1/4^th inch deep, across the dog.

Move another 2 inches down the dog to make another set of cuts for knuckles.

Tear off the end of the dog with all the violence you would need to defend yourself from an undead thing that wants your brains for a snack.

Roast the dogs in a 350° oven.  Bake them to any color that you want, because as we know, Walkers come in many hues.  The plague that causes the dead to rise as biters does not discriminate.  Or if you want to go for that “dead, but sunk in a pond look,” boil the dogs in water.  If you cook them in sauerkraut, they’ll have that “stewed in intestines” appearance.

 A bit of food coloring on the severed end adds to the realistic look.

Serve on a roll. 

Let's all hope that Carl finally gets eaten.  I'm tired of him, have been since season 2.

Enjoy the show!

Yeah, First Class On Saturday!! (Ham Stock)

Fresh Fun Foods enters an exciting new phase this week.  Our first class will be held at 1:00 on Saturday, 3/29.  Each class will be focused on a different topic and this week we’ll be talking about making stocks and how to use them to cook interesting soups.  Professional chefs use stocks all the time.  We make them out of the stuff that is hanging around the kitchen.  Home cooks can do the same.  Sure, you will have to make a large volume of stock, but they do freeze well.

The benefit of using a stock in a soup is that it provides another layer, a backbone to the soup.  You cannot get the body, that richness, any other way.  Here’s one recipe that I will be presenting on Saturday.  You would never throw away a ham bone in a pro kitchen and you should not at home.

Spots are still available.  Sign up today at http://www.freshfunfoods.com/schedule/.

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Ham Stock

1 ham bone

2 large carrots, roughly chopped

1 large Spanish onion, roughly chopped with the skin

the bottom three inches of a head of celery, washed, cut in half

1 sprig of parsley

1 sprig of fresh thyme or ½ tsp. dried

2 cloves of garlic, crushed

2 bay leaves

Put all the ingredients in a large stockpot and cover with 1.5 gallons of cold water.  Turn the heat to high, bring the stock to a boil. 

When the stock boils, reduce the heat and simmer for 2 hours.  Skim any proteins that come to the top.  Strain the stock through a fine strainer.

Mythology, Tomato Sauce and Your Italian Grandma (Tomato Sauce)

Our first cooking class is scheduled for next Saturday, March 28th at 1:00.  You'll find a full schedule at http://www.freshfunfoods.com/schedule/

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The mythology around tomato sauce is extensive.  Sworn essential ingredients are too numerous to list.  I have to use veal shins?  You certainly need olives, pork, Vidalia onions, use Chianti, no Barolo, at least two kinds or oregano, really?  Simmering times that must be adhered to vary from minimal to “I’ve had shorter vacations.”  And the key ingredient, as we all know, is an Italian Grandma’s stockpot.  An anthropologist studying foodways has a field day with this kind of stuff. 

Here’s the thing, like everything you do in the kitchen, use your head. 

Fresh is always better.  Buy tomatoes in season and make puree or diced tomatoes to can or freeze.  I’m still mourning the last of the tomatoes that my friend Jim Markowski got for me in August.  If you don’t have a connection like Jim, high quality canned tomatoes will work.  I like Furmano’s. 

Shorter cooking times are probably better.  Tomatoes are acidic.  If you simmer them for 24 hours, the sauce will be…acidified. 

Good booze is always better than cheap booze.  While you don’t need to reduce a great Bordeaux for sauce, go a step up from New Jersey plonk.   It might make sense to use an Italian style wine. 

A simple, clearly explained recipe is always better than the nonspecific, “whisper down the lane” family recipe.  That said, maybe you should find some time to cook with Grandma and write down her recipes.  That goes for Grandpa too.  He probably knows a trick or two. 

Still, with all that behind you, you will need to understand some basic technique to make a great red sauce.  Follow the directions below.  Take your time, enjoy how the smell of the various ingredients fill your home as you build the sauce and develop layer after layer of texture, aroma and flavor.

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Tomato Sauce (three quarts)

4 tbs. olive oil

1 green bell pepper, diced

1 medium onion, diced

2 cloves of garlic, chopped

2 tbs. fresh oregano, chopped

2 tbs. fresh basil, chopped

1tbs. flat parsley, chopped

2 c. dry red wine

6 oz. tomato paste

3 28 oz. cans of petite diced tomatoes

salt and fresh black pepper

In a large heavy bottomed stockpot, heat the olive oil on medium.   

Add the green pepper and onion.  Season with salt and fresh black pepper.  Sauté for five minutes, until the aromatic vegetables begin to wilt, but not brown.  Add the garlic, oregano, basil and parsley.   

  

Cook while stirring just for one minute, and then add the wine.  Increase the heat to high.  Reduce by half.

Reduce the heat to low, stir in the tomato paste and mix until it is smooth.   

Add the diced tomatoes, season with salt and fresh black pepper.  Add one can of water.  Increase the heat to high, bringing the sauce to a boil, adjust the seasoning with salt and fresh black pepper, and then reduce the heat to a low simmer. 

Simmer the sauce for 20 minutes only.  In that time, the sauce will have reduced slightly and will still taste light and fresh.

A Shameless Plug

We're not above commerce over here at Fresh Fun Foods.  Our friends at Wells Fargo, the mortgage company, like it that way. 

Our first class, Stocks to Soups, is running on March 29th between 1 and 2:30.  A couple of seats are still open.  Recipes for six stocks and five soups will be presented, along with variations that you will be able to use at home. 

Full information is available at http://www.freshfunfoods.com/schedule/

See you there!

Water for Ethiopia (Zucchini and Mushroom Bombe with a Tomato Coulis)

It is all too common for people my age to rage about how kids these days are internet-absorbed, lazy, video game playing couch potatoes who are going nowhere fast.  With much self-congratulatory confidence we assure ourselves that we were soooo much better when we were young, forgetting all those times when we bagged school, grabbed a case and went fishing at the shore on a school day.  There are good and bad in every age and I can guarantee from personal experience that my group was not always gold.  Likewise, today most kids are great, some are slugs.  They party like rock stars, flunk tests, act out and listen to that “Damn Rap!”  They don’t really care about others.   While there are young people who do all that crazy stuff, Marta Djalleta is not one of them.  She is making a difference.

I met Marta, her sister and parents at our church.  Her mother is one of the talented music ministers and I cook chicken with her father every 4^th of July for our big neighborhood Jazz Vespers BBQ.  For her 16^th birthday, she raised money for Charity: Water to dig a well in the Tigray region of Ethiopia.  We’ll be getting the GPS coordinates and pictures soon.  Now, she is on to a new thing.  Here’s what Marta has to say:

“… I would like to tell you all that I am doing another Chairty: Water campaign for my 40-day veganism during Lent.  I have a small goal of $500, but I hope to soon surpass this goal!  As a reminder, 100% of your donations will fund the building of a well. My eggs and cheese-loving self would appreciate your support during this trying period of my life!  You can show your support by going to: http://my.charitywater.org/MartaGoesVegan and donating whatever you can!”

Send Marta your money!  Thirsty communities in the developing world are counting on you.  And as soon as you are done, whip up this vegan dish to celebrate and honor Marta and her effort to help the neediest in our world.

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Zucchini and Mushroom Bombe with a Tomato Coulis (serves 4)

2 medium zucchini, sliced lengthwise into strips 1/4 inch thick

1lb. white mushrooms

1 28 oz. can of tomatoes, drained

1 tsp. fresh basil leaves, sliced julienne (long, thin strips)

1 small shallot

5 tbs. olive oil

salt and black pepper

Roughly chop the mushrooms and shallot by hand or in a food processor.  Be careful not to liquefy the mushrooms, you want them to be cut into uneven pieces about 1/4 inches in size.  Sauté the mushrooms and shallots in a heavy pan until dry, about 10 minutes.  Use a wooden spoon to keep them moving so they will not burn.  When fully cooked, they will be black and will clump onto the spoon as you stir them.  Move the mushroom stuffing into a bowl and reserve it while you do the next step.

Preheat the oven to 400°.  Spread 2 tbs. of olive oil on a baking sheet.  Lay the zucchini slices on the baking sheet, season with salt and pepper, bake for 10 minutes, until the zucchini cooks and begins to brown on the edges.  The mushrooms and zucchini can be cooked a day ahead and refrigerated until final assembly.

Preheat the oven to 350°.  Oil the inside of a small bowl or 6 oz coffee cup.  Lay the zucchini slices in the cups with the ends hanging over the outside of the cup.  Fill the cup with mushrooms to within 1/4 inch of the top.  Tap the cups to settle the mushroom mixture and drive out any air bubbles.  Fold the zucchini slices over the top of the mushrooms, sealing the Bombe.  Bake the Bombes in a shallow baking pan filled with 1/2 inch of water for 30 minutes, until they have heated through.

While the Bombes are cooking, puree the drained tomatoes in a food processor.  Strain them through a fine strainer into a 6 qt. saucepot.  Heat the tomato Coulis on high until reduced by 1/3.  stir in the remaining olive oil, add the julienne basil, adjust the seasoning with salt and pepper, cover and allow the flavors to blend and marry for a minute.

Serve the Zucchini Bombes on a large dinner plate.  Briefly reheat the coulis.  Cover the bottom of the plate with 4 tbs. of the Tomato Coulis.  Turn the Bombe out of the cups in the center of the plate.  Serve immediately.